Avocado? Avocadon't

Have you ever seen a pen that’s been chewed on? They’re everywhere.

Pen Island residents

It’s the Republican equivalent of vaccination.

You know, licking pens is rather the exquisite taste. When I have to get up early every morning to leave my house, I prepare by licking my pens. Sometimes, if I feel generous, I sit down and have a coffee before I nibble on the pens. I am not married and have a collection of 40 types of writing tools, varying from calligraphy brushes to stifts and simple pencils and anything in between. I work in administration and get home everyday by seven o’ clock at the latest. I don’t smoke, but I occassionally eat steak. I sleep in rather late, but always have six hours of sleep. I drink milk straight from the fridge, without heating it. After thirty minutes of scrolling meme videos I go back to nibbling on my shaking brush, and everytime I close my eyes, I sleep. Then I wake up always refreshed, as a baby who has no obligation towards the world. What I am trying to explain is that I live my life in the exact way I want. I do not concern myself with societal views of wearing kilted skirts, or attacking my own friends in a strategic video game. That would be pointless and cause me to lose sleep. It’s how I deal with life, y’know? Although if I were to strive against you in a friendly competition of pen licking, I wouldn’t lose.